Condos and "The Borg"

Written by Jack Broad

What possible connection could the infamous “Borg” have with the condo market here in the U.S.? Well read on and you’ll see how my crazy mind works some times.

In the weekend edition of the WSJ there is an article on the coming glut of condos on the market. The article is not talking so much about the already completed glut of condos, but the fact that many developers back at the height of the housing boom committed some of their own funds initially, started development of condos, rushed around and got loan commitments that would enable them to go ahead and complete the project and really got themselves STARTED on their projects to a point where they can’t really back away from completing the projects now. They’re COMMITTED in other words.

The article is attempting to explain why there was such a furious building up of condos in the U.S. during the years 2004 through 2006. It says: “Speculation was rampant as investors believed empty nesters and young professionals seeking an urban experience akin to what they watched on ‘Friends’ would prop up the condo market for years.”

Huh!! Are you kidding me? You mean to say that a bunch of people dutifully glued to their TV sets watched a sufficIent number of episodes of “Friends” that they were thereafter infected with the idea of “Friends”and their condo-living existence complete with congregating in their ‘hive-like’ structures in urban environments because it maybe reminds those yuppies of their dorm-like existence with their collegiate buddies and that somehow this idiocy became so embedded in their minds that it was as if ROOTED in the very cores of their collective psyches, so much so that it was the CAUSE of a furious condo build out. Ha ha ha!! That is an utter fallacy. Who are they kidding? Does the WSJ really believe that investors are so utterly stupid as to believe the above nonsense. What an insult to investors, yuppies and empty nesters alike.

What are we some sort of damn termite with a deeply embedded genetic goal to “build-build-build-until-we-reach-the-very-stars”. I must admit that some of the images of termite nests I found on a Google search do look quite a bit like some of those structures lining the shores of Miami and other cities around the U.S. if only because of how many of them are dark at night because no one is actually living in them.

Are we sort of like an ant colony pre-programmed by nature out of many millions of years to do things that way because “this is what ants do so we must do it.” Sort of like doing the “CC” (colonially correct”) thing.

This idea of “Friends” causing the excess building of condos in America is just another financial “insanity of the day” or another “lunacy of the month” being foisted off on the financially interested public.

I can just see them now… Millions of yuppies and investors, dark-eyed and unthinking sitting there thinking about their American Dream. Repeat after me in a robotic monotone voice: “I have watched ‘Friends’. I want to live like the lovely people on that show and laugh and say silly things. This must be one of my life-long sought after goals. It is now engraved on my inner being. I will forever more strive to achieve that end.” Give me a break.

If you repeated the above in that monotone are you starting to hear how it’s a bit like the unthinking Borg of Star Trek fame: “Resistance is futile. You will be assimilated.”

This even harkens back to my childhood when getting the bejesus scare out of me by watching a British show called, “Dr. Who”. There were these killer robots called the “Daleks” shaped like big salt shakers with rounded bumps all over them frightening little kids all over the United Kingdome with their: “You will be exterminated.” line of utter terror.

Okay, reel me back in please. I’ve drifted off into a no man’s land of utter silliness.

So you now see the connection between the condo craze and the Borg right? Sorry, we ain’t robots. We’re not the Borg. We’re not ants. We’re not termites. We are not even “herds of animals”. We’re living, breathing, thinking, beings – who can make judgements and decide and are aware of our environments and of ourselves. We are not machines.

What does this have to do with finance. Not too much, I guess.

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